Friday, November 19, 2010

Bah Humbug?

I'm a scrooge when it comes to Christmas. Not that I dislike the holiday itself, I just hate all the preparation beforehand. I think it's sad that stores feel this need to have both the Halloween items AND the Christmas items on display at the same time. I don't need the added pressure. I have no need to hear a Christmas carol hummed, whistled or in an elevator until AFTER Thanksgiving. My husband and I are on a very limited budget, and as much as I would love to spoil every single member of our families, we just can't, and sometimes that's depressing. But when I finally do pull out the holiday decorations, and I'm sitting there untangling several strands of lights, I look at my kids and wonder, "Why I can't approach life like they do?"

Kids believe, that's why. At this point, life has given them no reason not to.

My children believe that a small sprite with wings is actually willing to pay them for that tiny tooth, because she makes necklaces out of them. My children believe that I actually did talk to Santa Claus on the phone, and their behavior changes dramatically. They believe the sun sleeps at night and that clouds can cry, monsters can fit under their bed, and we should have a never-ending supply of quarters, because daddy pulls them out of their ears.

They believe people are essentially good and so they smile and say, "Hi" to everyone they meet, no matter what they look like, how old they are, or what color their skin is.

They find simple joy in watching a squirrel do a tightrope act above the street on an electrical wire. I once took them for a walk after dark on a rare windless, clear winter night, just for something out of the ordinary. I bundled them up in boots, hats, gloves and snow pants over their pajamas. It was so peaceful and quiet. The stars twinkled and every tree branch became a dinosaur. They talked about that for months.

Overall, they are very giving children. Kamrin is definitely the 'sharer'. It doesn't matter how much or how little he has of something, he will share with Kaiden, the kid next to him at the park, and the kids at daycare. If I ask him if I can sit with him on the big comfy chair, he replies in typical Dakotan style, "Yeah, sure!" Kaiden will hand out back rubs for as long as his little fingers will let him, and once in a blue moon, he will take out the garbage without being asked (but I do have to feel how strong his muscles are afterwards!).

Their love knows no bounds. It never runs out. They love family night all cuddled up with a bowl of popcorn and movie. They love home-made smoothies and hot chocolate. Kaiden once said of a friend, "They have more toys and a bigger house....but that's okay because I love you and dad more." Melts your heart. Kam doesn't really have to say anything, it's the way he plays with my hair, holds my hand, or squeezes his way up on my lap no matter what I'm doing. Although it is pretty common for him to say, "Mom, love you." They even attempt to sit silently for a few seconds before asking if I've had enough 'piece of quiet.'

So that's really what it's all about, finding that child-like wonder and innocence again. To believe, find simple joy, have faith, give without expecting anything back and to love without limitations. I'm going to do my best not to succumb to self-imposed stress or worry and just try to sit back and enjoy the magic of the holiday season and enjoy being surrounded by the people I love.

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